Awareness

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HOW TO DEAL WITH AN EMOTIONALLY SICK PARENT

I didn’t ask myself ‘Is she emotionally sick?’ I was eight years old and like many other kids, I just wanted to go play outside and make sure I had a clean pair of pants to wear to go to school the next day. Plus, what does ‘emotionally’ even mean to a kid?   I didn’t even ask if she was sick. I mean, she looked fine on the surface.  She could walk and talk, though she said and did things that even I found strange by moments. Like that time she put my hands on her tummy and told me she had a baby inside. She said she was the Virgin Mary and she was going to give birth to the child of Jesus Christ. As strange as she sounded and behaved at times, my mother was not running a fever or having a drippy nose.   When I

HOW TO FEEL YOUR WAY THROUGH GRIEF

I couldn’t believe he had done it again. I was so angry that I didn’t even take the time to ask myself what could be wrong with him. Instead, I marched right over where he was, grabbed him by the scruff of the neck, and threw him unmercifully on the cold concrete of the back patio. This was the nth time that day that the kids’ puppy, Snowy, had pooped in the living room. I had enough!   I watched him as he pawed the glass door, crying to be let back in. I yelled at him to go pee and poop as if a four month old puppy could have complete control over its bodily functions. He looked at me with pleading eyes. I pretended not to care and told him in a stern voice to go do his business or stay outside, his choice.   Snowy was a

HOW TO GET YOUR CUSTOMER TO KNOW YOU, LIKE YOU, AND TRUST YOU 

When Levy* (fictitious name) came to see me, he quietly walked into the room. He chose a seat far away from me. He sat in the chair, his back straight, his hands firmly crossed in front of him. When I asked him how he was, he answered, “Good.” Asked if he would like a warm cup of tea, he said “no” then he quickly glanced at his watch as if he suddenly had an appointment somewhere else. Taking in Levy’s behaviours, I knew what I needed to do to make him feel I am trustworthy of having him as a client.   Through my talking with him, I found out his father criticized him a lot, often telling him he wasn’t good enough. He said his family was very much money-oriented, with success determined on how much money each member made and saved. Laughing nervously, he said the bigger the

WHAT YOU CAN LEARN FROM AMAZON ABOUT SUCCESSFUL SELLING

I am in Hong Kong and have just been invited to attend Swiss Bank’s annual gala. I immediately start panicking. ‘What am I going to wear?’ I keep asking myself. It was my first time attending such an event in Asia and I, like you, love to make a great first impression.   I call my best friend Ping Yin for advice. She says, ‘I don’t know... What will the other women there be wearing?’  I find her answer unhelpful. How do I know what they are going to be wearing that night?   At the first chanceI get, I ask my (then) husband, ‘What do you think I should I wear to go to the gala?’  and he tells me to go shop around. Not helpful either.   Have you ever been in a situation where you didn’t get the help you needed?   I decide to go shopping

HOW TO DEVELOP A HEALTHIER RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR TEENAGER

“Do you wanna know why I am the way I am?” My fifteen year old daughter screamed at me one evening. Frozen on the spot, mouth open, I was unsure if I really wanted to hear her answer. Somewhere in my head, I believed she was ‘just’ another angry teenager who was about to unleash her wrath one more time.   Tears rolling down her face, she wiped them swiftly with the back of her hand. “I’m the way I am because of you! You’re such a hypocrite! You pretend you care, but you don’t! Want me to prove it to you again? What did I just say before what I just said?”   She had me again and she knew it. I went deeper inside my head to remember what she had just said prior to her rant, and my mind drew a blank. I looked at her, moving

FIVE KEYS TO TAP INTO YOUR HIDDEN CREATIVITY

When George* came to see me, he said he felt caught between two masters, his career and his passion. Can you relate?   Asked why his career wasn’t his passion, George said his job as a business manager for a high-end establishment paid super well though the hours were long and his clientage was hard to deal with sometimes. As for what he believed was his true passion, he said he had put it on the back burner (for many years) because he thought he was ‘out of’ creative ideas and had ‘exhausted’ all his resources. Listening to him talk, it was clear to me George had failed to tap into his hidden creativity.   Have you ever been in a situation where you felt like you could do much better?   After his work shift, George confessed he often went out. He said he needed to unwind at night

HOW TO RAISE CHILDREN WITH INTEGRITY

When Sally* came to see me, she was finding herself in quite the pickle jam. Her relationship with her husband was at such a level that she had jumped the fence and committed adultery. She said she felt horrible about what she had just done. She told me adultery felt yucky to her and that she never wanted to put herself in that situation again. She made it clear to me she needed my coaching assistance because she wanted to be able to live with herself again. Listening to her, I saw how Sally seemed like a decent person who wanted to live in integrity.   Through my talking with her, I found out her relationship with her life partner had been deteriorating for years. She said that when she wanted to talk to him about their relationship, he either got angry saying it was ‘all’ her fault or he

THE FIVE KEYS TO IGNITING YOUR PASSION AND CLOSE MORE SALES

Passion is infectious across sales teams and to customers.  Result: more sales closed.   When Claude* came to see me, she believed that if she tried ‘hard’ enough and kept working till she dropped exhausted every night, then she ‘knew’ what passion was and was therefore ‘living’ it.   But when I asked her how this ‘passion’ of hers was showing up in her business results, she shyly confessed she was struggling at bringing new customers in. She even said she had been living from pay cheque to pay cheque lately. This told me how Claude had done what so many of us do, falsely equate passion with sheer will.   Through my talking with her, I found out Claude was considering skipping ship; she was considering moving to a competitor of her current employer. When asked why, she said she felt like she wasn’t growing as a person and

THE FIVE MYTHS ABOUT CREATIVITY IN THE BUSINESS WORLD

“Who do you consider as being creative?” I asked my potential client, Kravis*, who sat in front of me clothed in a navy blue pinstriped suit, matching blue tie, crisply ironed white shirt, and bull-bear Tiffany cufflinks. Crossing his hands in front of me, Kravis leaned forward and affirmed, “Look Anne, there’s no money in arts.” To me, the mere fact Kravis had immediately associated creativity to arts told me how he seemed to falsely believe that creativity is a realm only accessible in arts. But is true? Is it always true that creativity can only be found in arts?   Here are five myths about creativity in the business world.   Myth #1. Only singers and painters are creative?  In a 2011 study (1) performed by the University of Hong Kong, researchers wanted to determine who Chinese and German undergraduates believed were the best national and international creators. Their study showed

WHY KNOWING EXACTLY WHAT YOUR CUSTOMER NEEDS PREVENTS MORE CLOSED SALES

Think of a time when someone you know had a birthday fast approaching and they knew in their heart and mind what they wanted to receive as a gift. Ever been in that situation?   They had thought about it long and hard. They knew in their heart they wanted that gift more than anything else. Apparently, they were this clear. Sometimes, such is the case for us, right?   One day, like many of us do, they walk up to their loved one and say with sparkling eyes, “I know what I want for my birthday.”   Perhaps preoccupied with other things, their loved one casually replies, “Oh! You do? Great! What is it?”   Taking a deep breath, this person affirms with conviction, “I want …” and, like perhaps you and me, awaits for reciprocity in kind.   Now imagine this person’s surprise when their counterpart utters, “No,