Equality

/Equality

HOW TO INTERACT FROM A PLACE OF SELF-CONFIDENCE

While attending a seminar, I was once asked, “How many of you would like to feel more self-confident at work and at home? Raise your hand.” As I looked around the room with my hand raised high, I noticed most people (if not everybody) had their hand up. This showed me how self-confidence is a hot commodity that everyone seems to want more of.   If that is true …   What makes self-confidence so elusive to get?   I believe the answer is, because we have misconceptions as to what self-confidence truly is.   Allow me to explain ....   Is self-confidence arrogance? Knowing that arrogance is that feeling we get when we think we are ‘better’ than someone else, is it any wonder the know-it-all (what I used to be) are actually deemed to have low self-confidence due to a lack of self-worth (loving self no matter what

HOW TO HEAL FROM A PARENT UNAWARE OF THEIR ADDICTIONS

(PART ONE OF A TWO PARTS SERIES) “You’re just like your father/mother!” “Why can’t you ever do anything right?” “What is wrong with you?” are some examples of what an unaware parent might keep telling their child(ren) out of their addiction to emotional patterns. When we think of the word addiction, many of us tend to list alcohol, sex, drugs, and gambling as the most ‘obvious’ ones while at the same time probably defending our position saying things like, “Others have addictions! Not me!” How do I know that? Because I used to be the sort of parent who claimed ‘Not me!’ when the word addiction was mentioned; I had a very narrow perception of what an addiction actually is. ‘So what is an addiction?’ you might be wondering. I believe the answer is, An addiction is anything that is consistently detrimental to the human spirit. If that is true

WHY KNOWING EXACTLY WHAT YOUR CUSTOMER NEEDS IS KILLING YOUR SALES

When Jack* came to see me, I noticed right away how super groomed he was. His beard was trimmed impeccably. His light blue shirt, fitting and ironed crisp, was tightly hugging muscles that must have spent a lot of time at the gym working out. Even his nails were nicely buffed and trimmed. Asking him how I may serve him, he said he knew what he wanted and what he had to do to get it. If such was indeed the case, why seek my assistance?   Through my talking with him, I found out Jack was a district manager catering to quite a few well-known franchised establishments throughout his city and beyond. Part of his job was to ensure uniformity of products and services under a specific brand. He said the hours were long, but the pay was really good. So, what was the problem?   Jack confessed he

HOW TO OVERCOME MONEY CHASING SYNDROME TO FIND TRUE HAPPINESS

When Cassie* came to see me, she said money was practically everything to her and money was driving her crazy.    Through my talking with her, I found out she mostly determined the importance of people based on the money they made, the financial savings they had, event the type of food they ordered in restaurants. Defensively, she added she also paid a close watch to her own bank account. When hungry for her favourite food in a restaurant, if the price was not right according to her (meaning, the item could be found cheaper elsewhere), she refrained from ordering it, choosing instead to deprive herself of happiness from eating her favourite dish.   Have you ever been in a situation where you deprived yourself of happiness?     Though she and her life partner were professionals who made good salaries, she dressed simply, barely any make-up or jewelry on,

HOW TO STRAY FROM ANXIETY TO LIVE FROM A PLACE OF WELL-BEING

  When Dixie* came to see me, her hands trembled a little as she talked about her husband’s anxiety. She shared how he apparently often sat in their apartment’s living room feeling overwhelmed, his eyes sort of absent, all because he seemed not to know what to do next. Dixie continued by saying she was getting fed up with her husband’s perceived inability to ‘get a grip’ over his life and she was now coming to see me to find ways for him to deal with his anxiety. What I asked her next became a game changer for her. I asked,   What about your anxiety?   Dixie’s mouth opened in a big O. I could tell she was trying to grasp what I was asking her because she said, shaking her head, “No, it’s not about me, it’s about him!”   Once again, I turned her attention back to

HOW TO ELIMINATE A OO7 DOUBLE LIFE

When James* called upon me, he asked that we meet in an open restaurant downtown Vancouver. Asking him why there instead of my office, he laughed and said, ‘Because I need it this way.’    On the agreed upon date and time of rendez-vous, James sat down in front of me and immediately placed his hands under the table where I could Not see them. This gesture alone told me a lot about James, how easily he pretended to be emotionally open yet felt the want to hide once in front of me.   Through my talking with him, I found out James was one of nine children from a very large Catholic South American family. He grew up being an altar boy, going to Sunday school, and saying prayers. But something was Not working for him… In his teenage years, he realized he was gay and being gay is

WHO DO YOU CALL TO ADDRESS EMOTIONAL LEAKS? 

Have you ever experienced a gushing water leak in your home? Where was it? Was it underneath the kitchen sink? Was it in the basement where water pipes tend to run hidden in the dark? What did it cost you to repair this leak?   In 2001, I bought a showroom townhouse. It had many upgrades like granite countertops, wooden kitchen cabinets, and so on. I loved this house house very much, it looked great on the surface… until the day I had my first water leak.    The day it happened, I did not know where the water valve was, so I ran panicking to my next door neighbour. He calmly came over, turned the water valve off, and told me to call a plumber. I had never had to call a plumber before and it made me feel deeply anxious and stressed out. Ever been in that situation?

ROUND AND ROUND

ROUND AND ROUND   Round and round We go again On the merry-go-round of life. Ups and downs, We think that’s life Until we get off our mount.   Round and round We go again On the merry-go-round of life. Laughter and tears We think we’re here Until we go deep within.   In and in We go again On the merry-go-round of life, Darkness and light Fuse into one Until we go round and round.   With love & compassion, Anne   What makes any of us go round and round in circles?   www.walkinginside.com www.fullmontyleadership.com

HOW FAR AM I WILLING TO GO?

HOW FAR AM I WILLING TO GO?   Am I willing to go beyond the stars Where you and I were born Where the sun befriends the moon Where rainbows bridge us all?   Am I willing to go further than the eye can see Where trees plant their roots Where flowers drop their seeds Where leaves take in the colours of seasons?   Am I willing to go deeper than the ocean floor Where all the river beds make one Where the illusion of division is triumphed over Where we all feel as one?   How far am I willing to go?   I am willing to go At the centre of myself Where I hear it all begins The point of origin That unites us all.   I am willing to go Where ‘broken’ lines disappear Where there is no you or me Where there is only a

I — USED TO THINK

I -- USED TO THINK   I used to think A tree was just a tree I saw it with my own mind Roots, trunk, branches, leaves.   I used to think You were different than me I saw it with my own mind Bodies, fences, judgement, fear.   Thanks to my mentor, I met me For a moment, I stopped thinking, In stillness, my mind cracked open Discovering sunshine cooling breeze within.   How refreshing To hear inside the giggles of a small child Who never thought we were separate Who's always known we all belong.   Because of my love for this child and me The lines in my mind are becoming blurry If there is nothing separating you from me Then, who am I? What are we?   Willing to know, I ask her to show me the way How I may serve her from a place

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