When James* called upon me, he asked that we meet in an open restaurant downtown Vancouver. Asking him why there instead of my office, he laughed and said, ‘Because I need it this way.’    On the agreed upon date and time of rendez-vous, James sat down in front of me and immediately placed his hands under the table where I could Not see them. This gesture alone told me a lot about James, how easily he pretended to be emotionally open yet felt the want to hide once in front of me.   Through my talking with him, I found out James was one of nine children from a very large Catholic South American family. He grew up being an altar boy, going to Sunday school, and saying prayers. But something was Not working for him… In his teenage years, he realized he was gay and being gay is


AWAKENING   I awoke in the middle of the night, Frightened and scared, Thinking I was alone. I looked around the bedroom, Stillness and shadows greeting me. What an unfamiliar sight, I thought to myself, To be alone with one’s thoughts, To be shyly greeting one’s feelings.   Out of habit, I called out a name, Thinking you would come, But the echo came back empty. I did not yet understand, Love is neither a name or a game, It is a flowing feeling, Like waves, rising and falling, Amidst our own waters.   Thinking I knew better, I turned my bed into a raft, I paddled day and night, Still hoping to find you, Afloat on another raft nearby.   Feeling more lost than ever, I finally stopped doing this crazy thing, And started instead to Listen to the wind Who has always known my name.   It said,


  I feel it... it is on the tip of my tongue, my brain is churning words, a seed is being planted, a thought is forming, a curious ponder is watered, until finally cracks open this question with sound,    “How do we question?”     Let’s start with ‘the’ English, sounds proper to me...   When an English speaking person wants to know something, what do they usually say?   In my house, my kids say,   “Can I ask you a question?”     The English word ‘ask’ comes from  the Middle English asken,  from the Old English ascian, ahsian, axian,  which means to inquire, demand, call, summon, ….     Mmmmm….     How do we question… in English?   Apparently… we inquire, we demand, we call, we even summon an answer!     Damn! Sounds kind of bossy, don’t you think?   Now I am thinking

Sharing Kindness

This weekend, Annabel Fisher-Speaker and I had the honor and privilege to address once again the recovering female addicts at the John Volken Foundation (home as well to the John Volken Academy & Lift the Children org). When I walked inside, I heard “You’re back! You’re back!” There was so much joy on these women’s smiling faces as I hugged them tight. “Where’s Annie?” I laughed. I loved their eagerness and openness. That night, I shared my past addiction to being a nice girl. Deeply afraid of my father as a child, I learned very early on to say yes even when my heart said no. I have carried this people pleaser addiction my whole life until I realized at ASAL a nice girl is not feeling (threw me in a deep sorrow). How can I be feeling if I am focused outside of me? I now deeply know feeling

By | February 23rd, 2015|Authenticity, Compassion, Leadership, Speaking|0 Comments

Walking Inside Hearing My Own Melody

I have made this 3:30 minutes video to share some things about me and my journey. This video touches on leadership, authenticity, and speaking. Enjoy! Here is the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W5AlWe9ODdk

By | February 4th, 2015|Authenticity, Leadership, Speaking|0 Comments
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